Although I have given this section a very light-hearted title, it is probably one of the most important sections of this book.
We have all had them, referrals which are not worth the paper they are scrawled on or the electrons used to send them by email.
Poor referrals fall into many types including, misguided leads, a friend who needs, one-minute knee jerks and works of fiction. All are equally bad, but each has different root causes.
Misguided Leads
A misguided lead is when a member believes they know what you are looking for but without realising it they have gotten the wrong end of the stick. These referrals tend to be very nonspecific about the person’s needs, they will be very loose and are often a complete waste of time, but given with the best of intentions.The best way to deal with these types of referrals is to have a recon meeting with the member who gave it to you and use the opportunity to help them to better understand you and what you are looking. I have done this on several occasions resulting in a better understanding of my needs and valued future referrals.
A Friend Who Needs Your Services
The friend who needs your services referral is often a friend who mentioned in passing once, that they were slightly interested in... A member may mention he knows someone who can help but the formal referral process is not done, so when you call the friend, the reception you get is often that they are confused about why you are calling. This is because the friend was not dealt with correctly by the referrer.For those who may not be aware of what a referral is, the following is a definition to bear in mind. A Referral is a qualified contact with another person about a specific or general need.
THE CORRECT SEQUENCE OF A REFERRAL US USUALLY:
Stage 1 – A Need
A person expresses a need; this is often in the form of a complaint. i.e. my computer just broke down, and I don’t know who to get to fix it.
Stage 2 – An Introduction
You (as the referrer) offer a suggestion. i.e. I know a computer repair technician called Joe Smith. He is very competent, and he is a member of my Group Your Networking Group business club. Would you like his card or would you like me to get him to call you?
Stage 3 – Agreement to Contact
The person with need then agrees to a form of contact or uses the card to call the contact themselves. You are then able to pass on the details to each other.
So in this case, there is a need, there has been an introduction, and the person has been told about the Group Your Networking Group member, and most importantly, the person has AGREED to the contact being made. This is a referral. If any of the three parts is missing, IT IS NOT A REFERRAL.
One Minute Knee Jerk
The most commonly poor passed referral is the one-minute knee jerk. These happen when you mention in your one-minute presentation a specific service for a specific type of person and then low and behold a member just happens to have a referral to cover that.These leads could be turned into genuine referrals, and the way to do this is straight forward. If you are given what you consider to be a knee-jerk referral, you should talk to the person who passed the referral before you call the contact. You need to be diplomatic, but you also need to let the person know that the referral is not yet at the stage where you feel comfortable calling.
You might telephone them and say something along the lines of
‘Hi Joe, just calling about the referral you passed to me. I just wanted to know if you had any more information about John's needs. When you spoke to him about me did he say he was looking for anything specific and what time did he say was the best for me to call?’.
As you can see it is a very polite way of asking some very direct questions about the validity of the referral. If the member has vague answers, you might want to suggest or say,
‘tell you what, it would help me if you could call them and just ask them if they have a specific thing I need to research for them before I call them, and what is the best time for me to call. This will let me be better prepared when I call them’.
By doing this it means you have acknowledged the effort of the member giving a referral, and you are allowing them to help you further by qualifying the referral correctly. In this way not only will your time not be wasted, but the member in question will have seen how giving an unqualified referral is not a good idea, and in the future will be more prudent and give qualified referrals.
Work of Fiction
The worst type of referral you can get is the work of fiction. These are handed out by members who have done little to find a genuine referral or who mistakenly think that they need to pass a referral every week. The power of a networking group is mutual trust. We all trust our fellow members are going to behave ethically and not give us fictitious referrals that waste our time.The way it will often go with a work of fiction referral is you will call the member to discuss the referral, and they will say that they have reconsidered and decided not to go ahead or they will never commit to discussing the subject of the referral.
The result of getting this type of referral is your trust in the other member is diminished, if not destroyed. Each time you see them pass a referral, you will be cynical and weary, and this is not an effective way to feel about someone you thought you could trust.
If you are passed a referral that turns out to be a lie, you need to do something about it, do not let them weaken your trust in the referral process.
First, do your homework. You need to note who they have also passed referrals to and ask a few questions about ‘how did that referral from xxx workout, it sounded quite interesting?’. You need to be very careful; you must not be blunt or too probing. If other members have suffered the same fate as yourself they will be dismissive of the referral or the member, some will even tell you the truth and express their concerns.
The way to deal with this is to express your concerns to the Leadership Committee. That is why they are there. They have procedures in place for dealing with these types of behaviours. Do not shy away from solving the problem, allowing someone to pass worthless referrals weakens your group.
One example I have used, in an education slot to make the point about poor referrals, is when I took an extra-long roll of toilet paper, holding it at one end I passed it around the meeting room with the aim of everyone holding it so we had a continuous roll. Once everyone had a hold, I asked them to rip it and hold a length of roll in their left hand. I then delivered my education slot about poor referrals, (basically a cut-down version of this section) and finished off with the statement, “if you are about to write a referral that you would not want to receive, use the paper in your left hand and not a referral slip”. It got a wry smile from most members, but I also made my point.
Do not give a referral you would not be happy to receive!