We have all visited groups where at the end of the meeting we hear the ‘chorus of the damned’, where member after member stands up and says ‘I have no referrals today’.
Do not get me wrong; it happens to us all. We have weeks that for one reason or another we don’t leave the office or we are so busy that we don’t get a chance to talk to anyone who could provide us with a referral.
Yes, we have weeks like this because we leave it to chance rather than plan our activity. There is no reason in the world that you should stand up at the end of the meeting and say the dreaded words, ‘sorry, I have no referrals today’.
Business networking is a participation sport. Your membership of your group is not a magic seat that will make you into a super human referral machine, in front of whom people with problems will form an orderly line and wait for you to dispense business cards and solutions. You have to hunt for referrals.
Active business networking does not just happen on the morning of your meeting. Networking is a way of thinking that puts you in tune with solving the problems of others. To be an effective networker, you must plan your membership and activity. You must conduct recon meetings regularly and in a structured way. You should be ‘network aware’, so you are not too far away from being able to recommend a fellow member.
This does not mean that you should think of other members before yourself, and not do your own business. Nor does it mean that you should bore everyone to death by dropping your membership of the group and its benefits into every conversation you have. It means that because you understand what your fellow members can offer, you are able to refer them with confidence and this becomes second nature. This is the networker mind-set.
The title of this book is ‘Beyond the Comfort Zone’ because I know from experience that if you do move beyond the norm and make an effort to be extraordinary, the rewards are more than you ever could have hoped. The surprising thing is that although in the beginning, it might seem hard to apply the techniques described in this book, it isn’t. The book is a guide and aimed to allow you to learn something new and useful every week. If you try to do everything in this book at once, you will fail - like trying to climb a mountain the second day you decide to learn to rock climb. You need to be focused but have reachable goals.
There are four stages of the learning process, and these are also applicable to gaining a networker mind-set.
Unconscious Incompetence
Your life before networking, when you didn’t know that you didn’t know. The state of innocence.
Conscious Incompetence
Where you know, you don’t know. Where you know you need to learn more, and must work hard at ‘thinking networking’. The state of learning.
Conscious Competence
When you know how to do things, but you still have to think to do them. You have the ability to do things well and find referrals and visitors, but you still have to actively think about the process to make it happen. The state of doing.
Unconscious Competence
Where networking is like walking, like breathing, like doing your job well, you just do it. This is when you know networking, without having to think actively. It is when you hear a problem; you can give an effective solution, by referring a contact. The state of excellence.
Which state are you in? Sadly I think that 70% of members are stuck somewhere between states two and three. This is because due to the lucky fact they stumble across referrals on a fairly regular basis, they think that the limited networking training they have done has made them effective members. Putting them happily into a comfort zone of ‘lucky’ results and breeds complacency.
One of the most effective ways of moving and keeping out of the comfort zone is to recon regularly. If you visit other members and have them visit you on a regular basis, you will find you become more in tune with listening for and spotting referrals. My theory is that because you are in a state of mind about learning about other people's companies, you then tune your brain into spotting opportunities for them and others.
Get out of the comfort zone and stay there, tell yourself that you are never to say the words ‘no referrals today’ again. The only way to ensure these words never pass your lips again is to get active in your membership of the group, actively recon, invite visitors, and get involved with the organisation of your group. In this way, you will move toward the state of excellence, and everyone should want to be excellent.